NEW DAY

We’re here.  After spending two glorious nights in the Virginia mountains with my childhood friend, we arrived yesterday at noon.  Restaurants here are open for business and half the people I’ve seen are ignoring the risk of catching Covid.  Luckily for me, the waitress who was wearing a mask waited on us.  Had the non-masked waitress approached the table, I would have sent her away.

The problem with pissing off restaurant staff is they really might spit in your food.  In college, I worked at Barnaby’s and witnessed such vile behavior.  While spitting in someone’s food was not tolerated, other less obnoxious behavior was.  We were kids having fun at work.  The reaction to a little too much hot sauce on the buffalo wings was hysterical, that is if you were not on the receiving side.

As the saying goes, “Boys will be boys.”  That thought brings me around to the subject of today.  There are myriad of expressions that say the same thing.  “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” It also makes Jack a grown up.

Over the years, I’ve found that the adults who still have some kid left in them are the most fun to be around.  When Jack and I worked together, each of us inspired the other’s inner kid to come out and play.  Keeping our inner kid alive and healthy is, for the most part, good.  It’s also very hard to, especially in today’s world.

Like everything else in life, striking a balance between being an adult and being a kid, is critical.  As a doc, my most enjoyable patients were adult kids.  They were also the most dangerous.  They tended not to follow instructions.  For the most part, they acted as if they were Supermen. They also tended to be overweight and out of shape.  They tended to have high blood pressure and diabetes.  They did not do any preventive procedures like colonoscopy or prostate exams because, in their minds, they were impervious to disease and illness.

Finding the proper balance in caring for them was difficult as well.  I never wanted to kill the kid in them, just stifle it on occasion.  Unfortunately, sometimes I turned “Jack” into a dull boy.

That brings us around to talking about me. As the elder Doc Segal, I was definitely all adult and somewhat dull.  The kid in me was dead.  Then I got lucky.  I got sick and was forced to retire.  Pat and Jerry, both longtime patients of mine, stepped up and began rehabilitating the child in me.  They brought out my sense of humor and, unfortunately, my love of food.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’m not blaming them for my obesity; I’m blessing them for being there when I needed them.  Not being able to play with them is one of my biggest losses from my move to NC.  It’s been fun, guys!  Thanks, again.

Now, it’s time to grow up.  Thirty extra pounds is killing me.  Trying not to kill my inner kid while losing weight and exercising is going to be a real task.  So, it’s off to meet the neighbors in hopes of finding a sensible playmate.  I’ll keep you appraised of my successes and failures.

Here’s your song for the day. Here’s a joke for the women:

Why don’t little girls fart?  Answer-Because they don’t have assholes until they get married!

Doctor: “What seems to be the problem today?” Patient: “Doc, I’ve got the farts. I mean I fart all the time,” The Doctor nods, “Hmm.” Patient: “My farts do not stink and you can’t hear them. It’s just that I fart all the time. Look, we’ve been talking here for about 10 minutes and I’ve farted five times.” “Hmm,” says the Doctor, as he picks up his pad and writes out a prescription. The patient is thrilled “Thank you Doc. This prescription, will it really clear up my farts?” “No,” sighs the Doctor, “The prescription is to clear your sinuses, it stinks like a fermented diaper in here. Next week I want you back here for a hearing test.”

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/barjokes/fartjokes.html